Tracks
potty mouth bird
[Caption:
[WOMAN (OFF-CAMERA):] He’s gonna come sit by you.
[MAN:] That’s crazy!
[WOMAN (LAUGHING):] Try to pet him.
[MAN:] No, nah, he’s got that big-ass beak on him!
[BIRD:] Fuck you!
[MAN (LAUGHING):] Fuck you?!]
One of my favorite videos 😂
sleep paralysis is honestly the most bullshit part of being a living thing. sometimes my brain just occasionally screws up and goes ????? uhhhh . cant move. here’s a demon
i love when my preschoolers pretend to be talking on the phone bc if u leave them to their own devices and observe they just start saying things they’ve heard adults say into the phone like “hello i have an appointment, i’d like some rice”
Tonight at the gym a man who looked like fuckin Thor asked me out and when I told him I was a lesbian he goes “oh. Chill. You know, my sister and I work out a lot together. She’ll be here tomorrow, same time.”
Like…did Thor just wingman me?
this is never going to not be funny
Rob Lowe says “that is fucking hilarious” with the straightest face ever
Bless you, Chris Pratt
This is the hardest I’ve laughed in so long
♫♫That’s not something that props can fix…that’s gonna be a little harder to fix.♫♫
It’s bACK.
I’ve seen this a thousand times and I just realized he knocks the fucking Mac of of the counter too
This is hilarious!
Hand kissing is sacred, high romance and I think we need to revive it
the idea of coming home to the love of your life is so soothing and nice I can’t wait to look forward to that
“6 meses atrás, eu estava suplicando a você que ficasse. Mas você não ficou. No entanto, se você tivesse ficado, eu não teria descoberto que as coisas eventualmente melhoram. Há dias que sinto sua falta e de todas as boas conversas que tivemos. Eu ainda te amo, só acho que não gosto mais de você. Acontece.”
